marriage

Bee's picture

sentiment, love, marriage

Tue, 08/23/2011 - 04:57 -- Bee

The weekend my daughter turned three I was at loose ends - she wanted to hang out with her grandparents, leaving me stranded in a small college town without any idea of how to entertain myself.

School was closed, there were no shows on, and I didn't want to see what was playing at the dollar theatre. I was bored, lonely, angry, and twenty-two years old. Without any discernible thought or planning I did something reckless and completely normal: I hooked up with an ex-housemate.

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Anniversary

Fri, 01/07/2011 - 21:00 -- Bee

Today we decided to go to Malibu and live out our Rockford Files fantasies. Except, you know, the car.

In theory this was our anniversary, but of what exactly? It has been fifteen years since we rocked up at the 24 Hour Church of Elvis, got hit with a magic wand, signed some papers, accidentally ended up on the evening news. Though in my view that was simply the day we scammed a discriminatory system, the day I became officially eligible for health insurance.

The only vows we took, the only promise I could have made given the distrait circumstances? To remain friends.

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Wise

Sun, 12/12/2010 - 07:45 -- Bee

I've never believed people can change; circumstances, yes, people, no. We are what we are from birth until death, and people tell you everything you need to know within five minutes of meeting. Yes, experience can temper attitude, people mature or deteriorate, but beyond that?

It is wise to listen to the stories people tell. Whether truthful or fiction, the future of your relationship is all contained in the introduction.

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Legitimate

Tue, 12/07/2010 - 02:52 -- Bee

It is so nice my daughter is an adult: the risk of kidnapping has vanished!

I can disclose my location, discuss and describe my immediate vicinity, share contact information! On my daily perambulations I can look at flowers instead of scanning for bad guys!

I no longer need to sit with my back against the wall.

Miles and years have converted the threat to piquant dinner table anecdote, but it was legitimate. Real. True. Not just a shouted refrain in a custody dispute: oh no. Someone factually held a loaded handgun to my head and made very sure I understood.

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RIP Paul Steven Miller

Tue, 10/19/2010 - 21:00 -- Bee

Seventeen years ago I went to a conference with my friend and colleague Jenni. We were both students, idealistic and outspoken, committed to making our society accessible to people with disabilities. We were making this happen by forcing the campus to comply with the ADA, and coordinating a task force for the Governor's office with the objective of reforming structural (translation: boring) policies.

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Allowed

Mon, 10/18/2010 - 21:00 -- Bee

This is a journal of displacement, documenting my decision to leave behind a place and life I loved in search of something different and somehow better. Not because I wanted to, but rather because it was necessary.

The rationale is simple: to stay alive I need medicine and access to doctors. To get that, I need health insurance, money, or to live in a country with socialised health care. One foot followed another from school, to marriage, to England.

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Honour

Sat, 09/18/2010 - 21:00 -- Bee

Somewhere in the muddle of moving my daughter received a package from her paternal grandparents. The contents included copies of the videos they shot when we all lived in the same town.

I was pleased to sit down with my grown-up child and watch the scenes of her evolving life, from a tiny little mewling scrap of a human to the robust and fleet-footed wonder she became. She was an exceptional and entertaining child; we had wild fun all the time, adored each other completely. I am hugely thankful someone recorded those moments.

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