I grabbed my kids, my python, and my frog, and I moved to my very own apartment by the beach, where the kids would always wear plenty of sunscreen. I stayed far away from animal shelters. No one should intentionally breed with an addict, and it's probably a good idea not to marry one either. Sometimes you just can't take care of everyone, you know? Sometimes, no matter how noble your intentions, you can't help. Sometimes you need to take care of the babies you already have and realize that you can't handle any more. Sometimes you just need to take care of yourself.
Attention, Single Mamas: George W. Bush has a proposal for you: a marriage proposal. That's right, he wants you to get married. You're particularly encouraged to don a bridal veil if you're on welfare and/or parenting as part of an unmarried couple. If you act now, you might even be able to get hitched before Congress makes its decisions about Bush's plan to fund marriage initiative and abstinence-only education programs with welfare dollars.