Really, I just want to cry, this is a crappy week and I'm trying to keep my chin up but its not working. Two months ago my sister and I had a falling out(I blogged about her not emailing/returning my phone calls), she thinks I didn't care enough to call her on her birthday and has stopped speaking to me. I tried to call her, my cell doesn't make overseas phone calls and she was in Paris. Now its actaully not like my sister to do this, she IS NOT a drama queen, she does however suffer from some mental illness history and has done this sort of thing every few years. Keep in mind this is a HIGHLY FUNCTIONING(PHD, great job, wonderful person)person. But this treatment by her is so painful I can hardly expressit. She hasn't returned one email since May 24. I have begged and groveled. Nothing. It keeps me up nights. We are VERY CLOSE and nothing like this has happen before. This week she said to our mom, if I would just call her(we Skype on the computer), it would all be okay--since I never called her on her birthday(of course I did, but lets not go there...)but I can't reach her all weekend...(she lives in Northern Ireland, so time difference).
PLUS, I passed over for a promotion, its okay, actually--I only wanted it for the money(which was good), but it isn't what I want to do--ultimatly...but it still stings, ya know?
And I had to work Sunday, because--Fuck, I'm in charge and no one else could.
Did I mention, I did the job for almost three months and didn't get paid extra, until they found someone new for it. Fuck.
Actually I love my job and where I work, but it doesn't exactly smooth the sting right now of being passed over.
Sorry, what a rant.
Top it off with my whole family is really happy, DH is happy and more content than I've seen him in years and somehow, now I feel even worse for their happiness not being enough for me...
Dh quit his job(not only did I support this, I encouraged it) and is home with the kids and is starting Art school in the fall. This is so great, he has always been the one who put of his dreams, so I am really happy about it. And altho we had a super great babysitter, the kids are even happier with him home and the whole house is running smoother and better. And he got a ton on $ Aid.
But normally I would share this with my sister and feel lots better. We email everyday. That is until two months ago. What the hell. Somehow I am suppose to be the big person here, the one who makes everything alright(which has always been my role in the family anyways), I'm the one trying to call and make up(altho I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG), but I will be the bigger person, because our relationship matters that much to me. But it just sucks.

I feel stomped on.