Ok, so i am super emotional, dog-dead tired, tender breasted, and strangely constipated with a tender addomen. Which sounds like ¨oh blessed day, I am finally knocked up again¨, but is actually, for me, my very same list as my pms symptoms.

I remember when i was pregnant, the first time I said anything to dh i was all like ¨my period is 3 days late, but i`m not worried about it because i have such bad pms i'm sure i'm going to blood stain my panties any minute now¨.

This is like a repetitive cruel monthly joke since my miscarriage.

This month it is even worse because in addition to the first sentence i am nauseated. I feel pukey- when i eat, or if i don't eat. No matter what i do i feel pukey. I have felt pukey since Wednesday and it isn't getting any better. So i feel a lot like being pregnant.

So it's this super head trip because i so want to be pregnant, and i so have no chance of being pregnant because we have used condoms 100 percent (without any obvious condom failure. Also when i was pregnant i could feel my cervix with my finger and it was really low and huge and hard, (hope that doesn't gross anybody out), but now it is relatively high and soft- definately not pregnant.

So i am way pmsy with nauseas that are probably caused by some bad slips in my hypoglucemic diet that i made while we were at Marineland that i haven't corrected by doing a double strict bounce back. Feeling pregnant for no damned good reason. The goddess hates me.