Mamido's blog

Nursing while pregnant

I just read a recommendation that you *do not* continue to nurse if you become pregnant, as the oxytocin release can cause strong uterine contractions thus miscarriage. I think this is a load of shit, personally, but don't want to take unnecessary risks when I conceive, which presumably will be soon. Afterall, I don't think breastfeeding releases any more oxytocin than an orgasm, and I've always heard that it's perfectly okay to continue having an active sex life during a normal, low-risk pregnancy. Anyone ever heard this about discouraging nursing if pregnant?

Periods

My periods returned around nine months postnatal, and I've had three periods so far. The cycle between the first two was 32 days and the cycle between the second and third was 40 days. I'm at day 33 now since the third period, with no sign that it's starting any time soon. My cycles prior to pregnancy were about 26 days long. I'm still nursing, and figure that's what's affecting them, but I'm curious if anyone else has experienced this? None of my mama friends that I've talked to in person have had this happen, and a few of them are on-demand and through-the-night nursers, as am I.

My 1YO daughter is physically aggressive

My 1YO daughter's daycare teacher told me today that she pulled on another kid's face and hurt the child. When the teacher tried to discourage her, she did it harder and more aggressively. I realize that all kids can be physically aggressive from time to time, but this seems to be a pattern since she was about four months old. She is like this with my and my husband, our pets, other kids and adults, and herself. She will hit, poke, scratch, slap, flail her arms, pull, tug, punch, bite, pull hair, and so on with gleeful abandon. I also realize that some of it is testing boundaries (she ALWAYS gets worse when we tell her no), but I haven't been able to figure out how to get her to stop.

Shrieking

My 1YO is into shrieking these days. Serious, blood curdling, eardrum piercing shrieking. She does it sometimes when she's frustrated (e.g., yanking at my pants and swinging around my legs when she wants picked up as I'm trying to finish the dishes). But other times, she just does it, then looks pleased with herself. This morning, she was standing in front of the full-length mirror in the bathroom as I was brushing my teeth, looking at herself, throwing her hands in the air, and letting loose a multitude of glass shattering screams. Then laughing at her reflection.

I've read that you shouldn't respond to this, so that the kid doesn't think she has to go to these lengths to elicit attention. I've also read that neither do you want to leave the room as is recommended for other undesirable behavior, to avoid a negative lesson about emotions (for when she's actually doing it out of frustration, I guess); that is, so she feels her emotions are valid and you give her a safe place to vent.

Sorry Shekina!

I just noticed your question posted after my entry about Easter. My rabbi has a very cool poster in her office that says "Thank you Shekina for making me a woman". I didn't find the name Shekina in my Jewish Baby Book but have found this out about it:

It's a term in Judaism which means the divine presence, the awe you feel when confronted by something beautiful, great, bigger than you, that you don't pass off as a chemical function of nature. It's inseparable from God, and feminine. Apparently, literally translated it means "dwelling place" and is thought to be the source of the universe's soul. Kabbalistic tradition associates it with the Earth.

What I like about my husband

I just responded to Traci's question about what we do (i.e., housework, kid rearing), and realized I was really coming down on the hubster. Then I started thinking about how much I love him and how bonded I feel to him even though he's a lazy ass and drives me nuts sometimes! So, here's an incomplete list of what I like about him:

He makes the best chicken breasts, no matter how he cooks them; grilled, baked, roasted, pan-fried. They are always perfectly juicey without being raw.

He makes up cute catch phrases that give us great "inside" jokes and stuff. His latest is that we should always strive to be PAPs, pleasant agreeable parents. Then we joke about needing a PAK (pleasant agreeable kid) and so on.

Abortion

I've got questions about abortion. I had one, quite some time ago, when I was in a loveless, unmarried relationship that I'd been trying to get out of. My partner was incredibly bright, the kid probably would've been a genius. I am hardworking, though wasn't exactly living a comfortable life at the time, and was a college dropout. Since that event, I've met and married the love of my life, finished my undergraduate degree, changed jobs, traveled in the US extensively and overseas once, got a great promotion, bought a house, and had the greatest baby in the world, my currently one year old daughter.

Easter disasters?

All I have to say is thank goodness I'm Jewish ;) though Passover's not a cakewalk; I've been craving chametz like a mofo!! Tonight, as soon as it's officially over, my husband and I keep joking about how we're going to have a beer in one hand and a piece of pizza in the other!

And fortunately, I love my in-lawed family. In fact, there are times I enjoy them more than my own family. We always have the first night Passover seder with them and it's usually a joy.

So anyway, I'm glad Easter and all the misery it's brought to some of you mamas is over, peace to everyone! Happy spring!!! I had my gorgeous baby girl this time last year and it is absolutely my favorite time of year now.

To have or not to have another baby?

Well, I'm going to, it's just that I don't know when I'll be ready. I loved being pregnant and I loved giving birth, and I'm excited about having that experience again. The thing holding me back is that I am so in love with my daughter, the first and so far only child, that I'm scared to weaken my bond with her by introducing another member into the family. And I know that I'll love the new baby as much as I do her, and I want her to have siblings, and I want a larger-than-three family. But I just want to have _her_, over and over!

I work fulltime and feel like I get so little time with her now. I don't want any more demands on the pathetically small amount of devoted attention I have time to lavish her with. I feel like I spend my entire week either working or preparing things so that I can work (e.g., packing her diaper bag, cleaning/assembling the pump, pumping milk, getting our clothes ready for the next day, packing lunches, getting breakfasts ready). I'm feeling pretty resentful these days.

Do you share sleep with your child?

Sharing sleep is also referred to as "cosleeping" and the "family bed". It means your kids sleep with you. Most mothers who do this nurse on demand through the night, too.

If you share sleep with your children, what are your reasons for doing so? Have you had any problems or complications from having a family bed?

If you don't share sleep with your children, what are your reasons for doing so? What sleeping arrangements do you practice instead (e.g., a separate nursery, a crib in your room, a cosleeper [aka "sidecar"])? Have you had any problems resulting from your chosen sleeping arrangements?

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